I've seen a few counselors over the years - mostly after bad break-ups and just for a few sessions, before I end up feeling almost as irritated with my counselor as I was with my ex's. Maybe there are others of you out there - smart, self-aware, not in need of coddling or berating, but wanting a skilled counselor who gets it.
I dig my counselor at Growing Open because she walks her talk. In our first session, she gave me an assignment, then called herself on how she was challenged in the same area, and we laughed about it (kinda had to be there). She's real, and not so real that I have to counsel her (yes, that's actually happened).
Downsides are that she's under 40 - wasn't a problem for me, but I imagine it could be if you want a more mature counselor. Also, she works out of a house - it's in a quiet, nice neighborhood near the waterfront - but if going to a house is not your thing, then either pass or ask about the walking therapy (she does sessions walking around lake washington). Last, I had to refrain from wearing fragrance because it's a chemical-free zone. I got used to it, but it's a no-budge policy, fyi.
The biggest tips I can offer is that this is pretty fast-paced, seriously honest stuff. She can see the deeper reasons of behavior, but is into practical skill-building - so be ready to work - as she uses the conversation as a live metaphor for life in the real world.
This is for those ready to step up, be called on b/s, and let go of victimhood/blame.
I wouldn't have been ready for this level of counseling a few years ago, but now that I am, my life is seriously shifting for the better.
Good luck!
more