Sixteen years old is the most emotionally vulnerable you will ever be. If you have been 16, you know what it is like. It’s not easy to live through, and it’s probably tough to be around. But if you have any illusions about being a caregiver, it’s your responsibility to show the highest level of compassion and empathy when you encounter someone this age who is in trouble. Because you were 16 once. And you should remember.\r
I was sixteen when I was in this church, and I was not treated right.\r
I was treated like my feelings were shameful, something to be hidden away.\r
I was sixteen when my best friend and boyfriend left this church in rapid succession. 100 people left Lakeview in less than a year, including their families. Everyone lost a friend. But everyone around me, as far as I could see, picked right up and moved on. They closed their hearts the moment those who left walked out the door. The shunning was in full effect. \r
The people who left were worse than dead. I know this because I got in trouble for grieving for them.\r
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When I was 16 and my best friend and boyfriend were forced out of my life, I was incredibly sad. I was sad for a very long time. I was sad the way that you would be if these things had happened to you when you were 16.\r
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I was diagnosed with depression and given drugs to treat it. And I was kicked out of this church’s school. The reason given was that I was dragging everyone down. To be clear: those charged with my care, religious leaders who spoke for God—decided that the way to deal with my sadness from losing my friends was to remove me from my remaining friends.\r
And that is the theme of this unholy cult from beginning to end. People—they are useful as long as they attend. As long as they give. As long as they smile. The minute they are gone, their very memories become profane things, to be cut from your heart, never mourned. If you dare to mourn, you become as disposable as those who left.\r
Only the church matters. Only the Jameses matter. Only the façade, the hollow claim that excuses all this blasphemy, that the “Lord’s presence is here every week,” matters. What godforsaken things they do to others, to their sons and daughters, to themselves, in God’s name. How He must weep.\r
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If you are still in this church, and you can help it, never be vulnerable. Never be hurt where they can see it. Don’t be 16.\r
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