JavaScript is not enabled.
Eat At Your Own Risk!!! - Review by citysearch c | Salty's On The Columbia River

Salty's On The Columbia River

Claim

Eat At Your Own Risk!!! 4/23/2007

My husband and I went for our first Sunday brunch there. To our surprise, there was no menu option--it's only buffet. This was the first big disappointment. It was elbow-to-elbow crowded (which was a surprise considering how dismal the food and service was). They definitely had a large selection: steamed king crab, iced snow crab and shrimp, fruits, breads, pre-made eggs benedict, made-to-order omelets/crepes, etc. I tried some steamed king, which was luke warm, rubbery, almost flavorless; then tried the pre-made egg benedict, which was leathery and also luke warm. I tried the mini-croissants. They were very good. My husband tried a made-to-order omelet, which was inedible, then a made-to-order raspberry crepe, which was just as bad. We ordered bloody marys. When we got them, they were literally undrinkable. They were bright red (as though they'd added food color) and tasted like stale generic watered-down tomato juice. We sent them back and asked for the mimosas that come with the buffet. The mimosa was just as bad: The champagne was so cheap it was acrid and had no bubbles it was so flat; the OJ was so watered down it had no pulp and very little orange color. The waitress acted annoyed to have to deal with us the three times she even bothered (including the time she dropped off the ticket). I had to get up to get my own crab fork after they bussed my used one and didn't replace it. This is seriously the 2nd worst breakfast we've ever tasted in our lives; the first was at a B&B in England, where the food was so horrible that we tried to slip it under the table to their geriatric cocker spaniel, but the dog refused to eat it. This buffet was $30! Are they kidding?! Any brunch place in Portland, you can order a fresh plate from the kitchen for less than that (and it'll be EDIBLE). Two hours later, I had horrible cramps followed by an afternoon of horrible loose stools. By dinnertime I was fine, so I assume that it was the brunch crab that caused it. Cons: Horrible food, bad service, expensive more
Summer SALE!!!:
15% OFF all yearly plans
Use year15 at checkout. Expires 1/1/2021