Kirsh, Joel D Kirsh & Kirsh

I've recently read the reviews from DeeDee and Lynn. After DeeDee's first post I privately wrote her to offer grief counseling services (at no cost to her of course). A former client wrote her and recommended this to her as well. We have not heard from her. It appears that it may not be grief that is motivating her, which is disconcerting.\r \r Our agency has provided professional counseling services, including options counseling, to expectant women/couples and birth parents for well over a decade. K&K refer women and couples to us and we provide counseling and social services to the majority of women who are connected with prospective adoptive parents through their practice. Steve & Joel encourage all women to seek pre/post-placement counseling. They even have them review and sign a form titled ""Why Counseling is Important."" Women have the right to refuse counseling; it appears this is what DeeDee chose. Counseling is always available to every woman at no cost to her.\r \r I've personally been with Steve & Joel during hundreds of consent signings. I know the mantra well. They review all of their rights with them, clearly tell them they are under no obligation to proceed at this time and that they have the right to parent this child if they choose. They explain the permanence of adoption and Indiana law related to consents. They encourage them to ""only sign"" if they understand and are ready to proceed. We have walked out of many consent signings because the woman needed more time or chose not to proceed. That is their right and Steve and Joel wish them well.\r \r The women we have worked with over the years respect and admire Steve and Joel. Women often tell me that Steve & Joel treat them with respect and compassion. They laugh at how many times Steve and Joel remind them that ""they are under no obligation to proceed."" Because of this I find it hard to reconcile DeeDee's recounting of her story with who I know them to be as professionals, and as men. \r more

Listen, I like Steve Kirsh and Joel Kirsh, they rock! They are totally super awesome guys, and are really nice! Pros: nice guys, with lots of experience Cons: they are full of bad jokes more

Obviously, DeeDee is hurting, but what she has said is absolutely not true. I have never coerced a woman into signing a consent to adoption -- nor would I.\r \r In fact, in recent years with a change in Indiana Law (which I recommended to the Indiana Legislature), we give nearly every birth mother, who signs a consent to adoption, the opportunity to confirm her consent before a judge. \r \r I always tell birth mothers that they have the absolute right not to sign a consent to adoption, but that if they choose to sign the consent, they will be held to that decision. I have walked away from more than one consent signing because a woman was not prepared to sign the consent. Additionally, over the years, I have had a number of women decide not to proceed with an adoption after the baby was born. That is their right. Those women do not receive an argument from me. \r \r The success that my brother, Joel, and I have experienced largely derives from referrals which we receive from both birth mothers and adoptive parents. To have handled adoptions for as long as we have, almost 25 years, suggests that people believe that we are involved in ethical practices, delivered in a compassionate, caring manner. \r \r I received a Congressional Angels in Adoption Award and special recognition from the Indiana General Assembly for my work in the field of adoption. \r \r I am truly sorry that DeeDee is in so much pain, but I wish she would not have slandered me in searching for a way to ease her pain. \r more

I feel terrible for any birthmother who does not have a support system but there are many options through Kirsh & Kirsh to establish a solid support system and deal not only with adoption issues but other issues you personally face as well. Laws are in place for a reason, they protect the child, the adoptive parents and the birthfamily. No, you cannot change your mind, even if it is only 72 hours after the fact. All of this is clearly outlined in the preliminary packet you receive and since it doesn't sound like you made this decision in the hosptial I will assume you had ample time to review and understand the laws and procedures. If a birthmother doesn't clearly understand the laws surrounding adoption it is because she isn't listening, not because they aren't told to her over and over and over. Ask any Kirsh birthmother and she will tell you the same thing. Steve Kirsh is a pioneer in adoption because he does it the right way. This is a choice but it should not be an impulsive choice. This choice should be careful and thought out and informed. You may have felt coerced by your parents but that isn't Steve Kirsh's fault or the adoptive parents fault; you just decided this 72 hours too late. And in this state too late is in the law books. more