Lance's Turtle Club

The Staff at this place are rude and should be fired if I owned the joint I woud fire that lazy waitress they have serving only the people she knows or like. So if youre not a regular or if youre of different culture nationatity dont expect good service or any service at all by that matter. That night I could never get a drink I waited at the bar for 15 minutes trying to make eye contact with the bartender to get a drink she knew I was there just chose to ignore me. Like I said she would be gone! I cant believe they can stay in business I guess they have plenty of regular customers that carry the place. Not gonna be forever people get old and stop partying that place is gonna be history Dont waist youre time going there its a shame cuz it used to not be like that while back I used to go there had some great times but its changed I will never return. more

The concept is unique and different. You call ahead and reserve your meat. They offer steaks, chicken, and skewered shrimp. We ordered shrimp and a bacon wrapped filet mignon...for only $10!!!! After retrieving your meat, you go to one of the 4 or 5 grill stations and be your own chef. You're provided with an array of spices, from Jerk Seasoning to Mrs. Dash. The place is built on stilts so it sits on the water. Expect to sway a little bit especially when it's windy. Also, Seabrook has its sailboat races every Wednesday so you can eat your food and watch the sailboats sail by. It's a wonderful way to spend a summer evening. Pros: cheap dinner Cons: crowded more

9 dollars for a vodka tonic...really.no wonder the place was empty.charge less and get some customers.plenty of cougar traffic looking for rich boat guy.great location does not warrent high prices.steak nite is great.....outstanding allways hot baked potatoes self serve...and cook yer own steaks.great concept.catch ? you have to pre order your food before you go.Gal taking food orders outside before entry is the nicest person in the place....the rudeness starts as you go inside.Who is gonna tip on a 9 dollar drink! i would be pissed off at the customers too.how much profit do you really need ? Pros: wednesday steak nite Cons: outrageous drink prices more

This is an oldies bar. Plenty of old men hanging around ready to insult your date. Place has an unusual odor that reminds you of a over run septic tank. Great fights in the parking lot for free. Pros: all thumbs down Cons: Cant think that hard more

This was the first and last time I will ever go to the Turtle Club. On Thursday, March 13. 2008, a very good friend of mine and myself went in for a few drinks and to catch up on old times. When it became hard to talk over the karaoke and drunks, we went to the upstairs patio to finish our drinks. This was around 12:00. At around 1, we decided to go downstairs to close our tabs but found the doors locked and all the chairs put up. After banging on the door a few times, the female bartender turned, looked at us, then walked away! Astonished, we started to yell through the door that we needed our credit cards back. We were met by the male bartender/barback and were told that they were closed. My friend and I were trying to explain that we weren't interested in anything other than closing our tabs when he told us that they had called "last call" 45 minutes ago and that the tabs (with our cards) were dropped in the safe. Of course, there was no key. We would not have been so angry, but in my 13 yrs. of bartending (my friend is a bar manager at a popular location in Clear Lake), I have never called last call at 12:15! Also, if I had open tabs with individuals I saw less than 10 minutes ago, I would at least look for them! The end result was my having to drive 20 mins there the next day, couldn't talk to management because they weren't there, wait another 20 mins for my tab, discover the bartender wrote in her own 20 percent tip, and drive home 20 minutes severely ticked off! My friend was never able to speak to a manager either. Not only did they display poor business practice by shutting the bar down with patrons still on the grounds but they are setting themselves up for huge problems by holding our credit cards against our will and allowing us to possibly leave with alcaholic beverages! Rude, Lazy, and Stupid....that's the only way to describe the staff. If you go, please take cash! Pros: The crowd is friendly Cons: Poor management, lazy staff, understaffed more

I'll rewrite this as I wrote it to the owner: I just wanted to say I love the Turtle Club, I love the bar and I love the ambience but I was VERY aggravated by the service I received this evening of Thursday October 3 between 11:30 pm and 12:00 am from two women, one named Teresa and another women with a bikini on. I was upstairs, drinking from sundown until 11:30 pm when they said upstairs was closing and that we had to move downstairs. We did, no problem. I was with a group of rowdy men that were probably not acting like gentlemen but that IS NOT my fault. All of a sudden Teresa cards ME. I WAS NOT acting up or out of line. I happen to be from out of state. I just moved here from Redondo Beach, California. My ID is from out of state. I am a 26 year old female. My birthday is December 17, 1980. Those two bartenders carded me, the first time I had been carded since I had been drinking there all night, kicked all of us out on the basis that "they do not accept out of state ID's!!!" I am clearly "of age" and why they picked on me I do not know but I really do not appreciate it and I found their treatment very rude. I can only assume being that I look young I was an easy excuse to kick us out. PS. two other men in our group had out of state IDs why did those two women pick on me? They threatened to call the police on me simply because I asked them their reasoning! We were there for a BP (Beyond Petroleum) group meeting. I assure you the Turtle Club will NOT be getting anymore of our business anytime soon. You should tell also tell that old cheese tittts bartender no one wants to see her old, saggy breasts in a bikini. That is disgusting! I find her in a bikini personally offensive! The Turtle Club WILL NOT be getting any rave reviews from me or anyone else in our group based on the treatment we received from those two women this evening. I highly doubt that you even care about this email but this is one unhappy customer. Pros: Cool location...if you're a gold digger Cons: Mean and rude bartenders more

The atmosphere seems to be, a paradise for what may be called a gold diggers smorgasboard of older gentlemen for young women I noticed alot of blondes and men with big boats, who are enjoying the fruits of their labor and a chance at recapturing youth. Oh yes and no food! Pros: Hm? Cons: no food, go run and get your own beer at the bar. more

trendy bar, have 5 ex girlfriends out of this club. Nice boats and women to go along with them. more