Okay, I don't even know where to start...(deep sigh)...here we go. FIRST, I am an original country boy from NC so I know my food. Now, my gps took me straight into the HOOD YALL! I mean IN the hood. Not just 2 streets in the hood ALL the way DEEP in the HOOD, I mean I could had ran for MAYOR b/c I was so in there.
Then when I get there & go in I was ""greeted"" by a thug sitting down talking on his phone! No ""hello,"" no ""how are you doings"" just said ""yo-have a seat any-whar""??? The whole restaurant was PLASTERED by Pres. B. Obama pics EVERYWHERE & the tv blasted with MSNBC (I felt like I was in his campaign headquarters-black folks). Then what grab my attention was that was a KOOL-AID DRINK MACHINE!!!! WHAT?!!!! Oh God touch my people. Then it took FOREVER for my waitress to come to the table. Now, I don't know about you but I thought the gold teeth where out but she till had them (what da hell?) but I will give it to her that she was nice.
So I proceed to tell her that it was my 1st TIME there, so she suggested some things to me & I end up ordering fried chicken, small portion of turkey wings, collard greens, mac & cheese, rice & gravy, biscuits & sweet tea (I know, I was happy too!). Now this is where it gets crazy (like it wasn't already).
So when ""Foxy Brown"" brought me my food I was excited till I saw it. FIRST, as someone from the country, black & can cook, I HATE FAKE GRAVY-PERIOD! HELL, you are an SOUL FOOD REST w/ McCormick Brown gravy???!!! What happened to flour, water, oil & stock???! (OMG-I need to teach a cooking class!). Now, I will say the the collard greens was VERY GOOD but that was about it! The mac & cheese was HORRIBLE! It wasn't elbow mac & some huge pasta! Then the smothered turkey wings tasted like OLD MEAT! TRUST ME, GROWING UP POOR I KNOW WHAT OLD MEAT TASTE LIKE-(thank GOD I ain't poor no more!!). The tea was syrupy, now I know what sweet tea should taste like, this was some cheap tea bags with a pound of sugar to attempt to cover the taste. And the BISCUITS tasted like WOOD!
NOW THE CHICKEN---OH GAWD!!!! I'M HAVING FLASH BACKS!!! THE CHICKEN!!! THE WORST FRIED CHICKEN EEEEEEE-VERR!!!! First the SMELL of the chicken was like OLD GREASE! It seemed like someone took a teaspoon of flour & sprinkled it on the it-NO CRUST! The skin was TASTELESS & BLAND! But then yall-the NIGHTMARE! When I pierced the chicken BLOOD came spewing out like someone just struck oil! OH HELL NAY'LL!!!!!
So, I calmly, asked the waitress to come over & I explain, showed her my concern. She said she understood but would have to CALL Mrs. Betty to see if they had to charge me??!!! SEE THIS IS WHY BLACK BUSINESSES STAY IN THE SHAMBLES THAT THEY ARE IN!!! NOW, IMMA TELL YA, I DIDN'T CARE WHAT THE ANSWER WOULD HAD BEEN I WASN'T GOING TO PAY FOR NUTIN!!!
So after she came back she said that Mrs. Betty apologized & for not to let this be my last time to come. (I know, don't say anything, I just came from church). And yall, to top it all off, when she went to remove the food from the table she SPILLED the food all over herself & the table.
(Deep sigh)...I left her a $1 tip...black folks, please do better.