I don't know what you people are talking about! When I arrived the staff walked me down a red carpet, and escorted me to a private chamber where I was given a pre-viewing massage. I then stepped into the theater, received a complimentary popcorn-flavored chapagne, and a free wife. But these are just small praises. What really stole the show was the hand dryers. I've been an amputee since birth, and 2 seconds under it's warm breath healed my arm and gave me a third one growing out of my back. I also saw a bear wearing a purity ring and eating kitten muffins. A wonderful theater.
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