Reminiscent of the video arcade pizza parlors of my end-of-soccer-season-party youth, I stumbled into La Val's with a slight smile on my face. Yet don't be fooled: the place gets more business for its cheap beer prices and Telegraph's sidewalk drifters than anything. Its pizza is absolutely the most bland reincarnation of butcher paper strewn about with flat tomato sauce that I can fathom. I gave it a second chance for its meatball sandwich, which was alright, though only for the big, fat glacier of slowly sliding melted cheese on top. Here, flavor is more fat than anything: rely less on a witty Italian spice jubilee. Pass this place right on by.
Pros: plenty of seats, short wait
Cons: awful hang-abouts, ratty locale, awful food
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